A Holiday Tip for Adoptive Couples

As this month of Thanksgiving comes to an end, and the Christmas season is now in full-swing, many of you may be preparing to send cards or letters to family and friends. This is just a friendly reminder to our adoptive couples that your Christmas correspondence is an excellent opportunity to announce and/or remind everyone you know that you are hoping to adopt. You can share a link to your profile, and maybe even include a few pass along cards for them to hang on to in case the topic ever arises with someone they meet.

Putting yourself out there can be difficult and even uncomfortable at times, but the more people know you want to adopt, the more chances there are for conversations to be had and connections made to help you find your birth family.

So here's to a very Merry Christmas, a Happy New Year, and here's hoping that your dear Aunt Suzy in North Dakota reads your Christmas card and just happens to know someone who knows someone...

Here's to finding your forever family!!!

Happy Holidays

The Lord's Timing

The phrase, "...in the Lord's timing...," is often spoken in an attempt to comfort couples waiting to adopt. For me, "in the Lord's timing..." just means I am expected to be patient and wait for a really long time for something I want now.
It was not until we adopted our first child, not until over six childless years of marriage, that I understood the Lord's timing. For those six plus years I very impatiently mourned and moaned and pouted about my trials and how I thought things should be different. While my feelings of sadness and longing stemmed from a righteous desire, my reaction to them were rarely faith-filled.

In our seventh year of marriage we adopted our first child and I must tell you, the experience of holding my son for the first time was like a scene from a movie, where several scenes quickly replay before your eyes. I was able to see in that moment that so many of the trials and challenges we had been through were necessary to poke and prod us along a path the led right to that very perfect moment.

Earlier this month, as part of our National Adoption Month celebration, I had the opportunity to attend a special chapel session in the San Diego Temple. The brother conducting the meeting spoke about the significance of the star of Bethlehem, and how, in order for THAT star to appear with such brightness in THAT spot in the sky on THAT night, events had to have taken place in the solar system several years prior.

He concluded that just as the Lord knew what was needed in order for that star to appear at the right time, He also knows what we need and WHEN we need it so that he can bless us as much as possible.

The tricky part, of course, is to let His timing lead us and not let our timing take precedence. For example, even though I had that remarkable experience, sure enough each time our little family hopes to adopt again we have mapped out our "perfect timing" for the blessed event. However, as we see beautiful decorations this holiday season depicting the Star of Bethleham, I hope it will be a reminder to all of us that the Lord's timing will always poke and prod us to where He needs us to be in order to receive the greatest gifts.

NATIONAL ADOPTION MONTH

November is

National Adoption Month.

Here is what our local chapter is doing throughout

November to celebrate the mircale of adoption.

Families Supporting Adoption’s
2nd Annual
National Adoption Month Service Project.

Throughout the entire month of November, Families Supporting Adoption, San Diego Chapter, will be collecting items to donate to Straight From the Heart, Inc., a resource center and resale store in San Marcos, CA, providing help to Foster Children and Foster and Adoptive Parents. We are asking for new or gently used items for children ages newborn to 5 years, such as:
Clothes, shoes, car seats, high chairs, cribs, dressers, twin bedding, crib sheets, diapers, wipes, bottles, educational toys, swings, bouncer chairs, boppy pillows, backpacks, crayons, pencils, burp cloths, bibs, diaper bags, baby carriers, hats, wash cloths, and hooded towels.
(No stuffed animals, please)
You can bring your donated items directly to the store at:
839 W. San Marcos Blvd. San Marcos, CA 92078, Tues 9-2, Wed-Fri 10-3
or contact sandiegofsa@gmail.com
if you would like to arrange for pick-up.

San Diego Temple Trip
Saturday, November 5, 2011

San Diego LDS Temple
7474 Charmant Dr
San Diego, CA 92122

A special Chapel Session with the new
Temple President, and Adoptive Grandfather,
President Finnigan, will
begin at 5:00 p.m.

The Endowment session begins
at 5:30 p.m.

Followed by a trip to
BJ’s Restaurant
8873 Villa La Jolla Dr.La Jolla, CA 92037

This Temple Trip is for any endowed
members of the Church of Jesus Christ
of Latter-day Saints who are interested in adoption, has been, or currently is involved in the adoption process,
and all adoption advocates.

Upcoming Training Meeting

LDS Family Services and Families Supporting Adoption (FSA) invite you to attend an,

Adoption Training Meeting

Wednesday, September 21, 2011
7:00p.m.-8:00 p.m.

Del Mar Stake Center
12701 Torrey Bluff Drive
San Diego, CA 92130

Topic: Keys To A Successful Open Adoption
Presented by Tera Miller

Tera will discuss ways for birthparents and adoptive families to communicate successfully.
Tera is a birthmother, and recently completed her Masters degree in Social Work. She was also a presenter at the FSA National Conference in Layton, Utah this past August.

This meeting is for anyone who is interested in adoption, has been, or currently is involved in the adoption process, and all adoption advocates.

***For couples currently in the adoption process, this class can be applied to the required hours of adoption training.

If you have any questions regarding this meeting, please feel free to contact Amanda Beebe at sandiegofsa@gmail.com, or visit the local FSA Blog at http://sdfsachapter.blogspot.com.

So Long Summer...

San Diego's FSA Chapter invites you to
please join us for an afternoon at Powerhouse Park
1600 Coast Blvd.
Del Mar CA
Saturday, September 10, 2011
3:00 PM - 5:00 PM

We will be meeting at the park with the beach directly below us. Snacks and drinks will be provided. To find out more about the park check out this website:

http://www.sandiegocoastlife.com/attractions/san-diego-coast/parks-powerhouse.html

Please RSVP in the comments section (if you have not done so already via e-vite) so we can make sure we have enough food. Hope to see you there!!!

We are the Champions, My Friend!!!

Remember THIS post about the 2011 San Diego Fair???

Well...WE WON!!!!!!!!!!!!

Last week our chapter received a letter stating,"On behalf of the San Diego County Fair, we would like to congratulate you on a cash award of $100.00 for your organization."

I am so proud of our little chapter-that-could and thankful for everyone who helped make our booth a success. We are grateful for this prize, and hope to use the funds to continue to make a positive impact in the adoption world and in our local community.

Straight From the Heart

During our June Adoption Training Class we had the privilege of hearing a presentation on Special Needs Adoption from guest speaker, Patty Boles.

Patty has been a foster parent to over one hundred children, is an adoptive mother to ten, serves as the president of the North County Foster Parents Association and as executive director of Straight From The Heart, a non-profit resource center and resale store providing support and assistance to foster families. As Part of the Grossmont College Foster and Kinship Care Education Program , Straight From the Heart provides free workshops, classes, and CPR/1st Aid training for foster and adoptive parents.

Most recently, Patty's great advocacy work as been highlighted in THIS North County Times cover story.

To learn more about Patty and Straight from the Heart, feel free to call or visit the resale store located at 839 West San Marcos Boulevard in San Marcos,760-744-224.

You can also support this great organization by donating your gently-used baby and kid's clothing to Straight From the Heart, and encouraging others to do the same.

A Day in the Life- Transracial Adoption

This is a blog post from the personal blog of FSA board member, Erin Packard, as shared during the "Transracial Adoption" class in June.

What Does Your Skin Say?

Today we had some family over to enjoy the pool. The older kids were in the big pool with Auntie Kim, and I was hanging out with Carson in the kiddie pool. There was one other child in the kiddie pool, a little girl, probably two years old. She was with her father. I noticed that he was covered in tattoos. I really did not give him or his tattoos much thought. He seemed to be having a good time with his little girl and that was that. However, at one point he turned around and I saw that one of the tattoos on his back said, "White Pride." Now, any other time in my life I would have just chalked that up to ignorance and gone on my merry way. But this time was different. This time I was in the pool with Carson. This time my heart broke. This time I was filled with questions and anger and fear.
I do not ever recall being a victim of racism. I have, however, been discriminated against. I know what it felt like to be treated differently because I was overweight, and what was even harder to swallow was the way some people treated me when I was thin again. I know what it is like to ask questions to someone and have them respond to my husband because he is clearly the more intelligent species. Yet, I am certain those uncomfortable circumstances pale in comparison to what it must feel like to be treated "less than" solely because of the color of your skin.
During the adoption process, we filled out a form stating which ethnicity we were willing to accept. As much as I ALWAYS wanted a little black boy, this was not a decision we made lightly. Before Carson was ever thought of, we had discussed the ramifications of having a mixed race family. Once we knew that Carson's birth father was black, we continued our discussions more intently. What issues would arise? Would kids treat him differently? What race would he identify with? When issues/discussions of slavery, race, and racism inevitably arise, how will we possibly be able to truly empathize with him? After many nights of pillow talk, prayer, and visits to the Temple, we felt very comfortable with our decision to accept children of other races into our family. And really, the "accepting them" part wasn't the issues, as much as was our need for confirmation that we, as a family, would be able to overcome whatever obstacles we may face as we potentially became a multi-race family.
So along came Carson, our perfect miracle. And as weird as it sounds, sometimes I forget that he is adopted and that he is half black. I just look at him and see my child. But not today. Not in the pool. Not when "White Pride" is staring me in the face. Not when my little tan-man is singing and dancing happily with his little fro bouncing side to side on his huge head. Not when he does not know that the nice man behind him has already categorized him, has judged him, has hated him. No, today I remembered vividly that what Carson's skin says to me is eerily very different from what it says to others. And what that man's skin says to me, in hideous bold lettering, is that we may have some very big hurdles to face down the road.
But for now, I am going to try and take my cues from Carson, who did not seem to notice a thing, and willingly shared his song and dance and sweet smiles with that man, as freely as he did everyone else.

Transracial Adoption Resource Guide

One of the topics covered during our Adoption Training Class in June was "Transracial Adoption."

Here are a list of resources noted in the handout from that class:

Children’s literature:
Whose Knees are These? by Jabari Asim
A Mother for Choco by Keiko Kasza
All the Colors of the Earth by Sheila Hamanaka
I Don’t Have Your Eyes by Carrie A. Kitze
10 Days Until Forever by David Peterson
Red or Blue, I Like You (Sesame Street) by Dalmatian Press
The Rainbow Zebra (Cloth Book) Author Unknown


Books for Parents:
I'm Chocolate, You're Vanilla: Raising Healthy Black and Biracial Children in a Race-Conscious World by Marguerite Wright

Movies:
Stand and Deliver
Remember the Titans
The Blind Side

Blacks and the LDS Church:
Genesis Group: http://www.ldsgenesisgroup.org/index.html

http://www.blacklds.org/

Other links I have found helpful:

http://www.blackcityinfo.com/california/california-san-diego.html

http://www.adoptivefamilies.com/culture_AfricanAmerican/

http://familiessupportingadoption.blogspot.com/2010/03/article-transracial-adoptees-can.html

***If you have any great books or resources about transracial adoption, please post a comment on the blog so we can share this information with the group.

FSA Picnic- Postponed until Fall

Coming this Fall...

Families Supporting Adoption Picnic.

Details are still TBD, but it is sure to be a great night with
family, friends, fun, and food!

Good Reads for June 2011

Bryan Khel's Big Family and The Blessings of Adoption
Mormon Times, June 16, 2011

Infertility: When Children Don't Come Easily
Mormon Life.com, June 3, 2011

The Only People Who Finish the Race are Those Who are Given a Start!

This past Friday and Saturday, FSA was proudly represented at the San Diego County Fair at the Del Mar Fairgrounds. The theme for this year's fair was "Race to the Fair." Prize money is awarded to the booths that best incorporate this theme with their booths. We pulled out all the stops and did our very best to find a correlation between "cars" and "adoption." We think we did a pretty good job.

Here is our booth, adorned with racing flags.

Congratulations and a big THANK YOU to Emily B. of Kansas City, MO for making such a great banner. And thank you to Ben P. of Carlsbad, CA for printing the banner for us. Thanks to Emily S. of San Marcos, CA for painting this license plate for our booth decor.Thank you to Peggy Shepherd of the National FSA board for helping to create key chains for our event to distribute to all the fair goers.

Thanks most of all to Amanda, Nicole, Alexx (and daughter,) Becca, Christine (and hubby,) and Erin for serving at the booth. Even if we do not win a prize in the end, it was worth the effort. Saturday traffic near our booth was pretty slow, but Friday was fairly steady. Both days we had opportunities to have positive conversations about adoption, discuss the services we provide, interact with many great members of our community, and witness individuals indulge in such delicacies as deep fried kool-aid and chocolate covered bacon. All in all, the weekend was a success.

Adoption Training Meeting

LDS Family Services and Families Supporting Adoption (FSA) invite you to attend an,

Adoption Training Meeting

Wednesday, June 15, 2011
7:00p.m.-8:00 p.m.

Followed by a Mix and Mingle from 8:00-8:30
This time will be a great opportunity
to meet and Q&A with
others involved in the adoption world.

Penasquitos Stake Center
12835 Black Mountain Road
San Diego, CA 92129-3656


We will be covering the following topics:

“Transracial Adoption”
and
“Special Needs Adoption"


This meeting is for anyone who is interested in adoption, has been, or currently is involved in the adoption process, and all adoption advocates.

***For couples currently in the adoption process through LDSFS, this class can be applied to the required hours of adoption training. If adopting through another agency, please confirm with that agency if they will also accept these classes for their required training.

If you have any questions regarding this meeting, please feel free to contact Amanda Beebe at sandiegofsa@gmail.com

Philip Rivers 5k Walk & Fun Run

Philip Rivers 5k Walk & Fun Run
Saturday, June 11, 2011
NTC Park at Liberty Station
5K run will begin at 8:15 am and the walk will begin at 8:30 am
Proceeds benefit the Rivers of Hope Foundation

The Rivers of Hope Foundation is a non-profit charity started by Philip and Tiffany Rivers in 2010.

The organization's mission is "to help children in need of a forever family find permanent loving homes and their own sense of self-worth by developing and coordinating resources and programs to create community awareness, recruit adoptive families, provide financial aid for adoption and assistance for foster children and orphans."

What better way to start your day???

If you would like to participate in the event or serve as a volunteer please visit the official website @

http://www.philiprivers5k.com/

Race to the Fair -Banner Contest

We are very happy to announce that our FSA chapter will have a booth at the San Diego Fair again this year. Our booth will be located at the in-field pavilion on June 10th and 11th.

Each year prize money is given to non-profit organizations for the "best booths" in the pavilion over the course of the fair. One of the best ways to win is to have a booth that correlates with the theme of the fair. This year's theme is "Race to the Fair."

In keeping with the theme, we have had adoption key chains made to distribute, and have come up with a banner idea, but need YOUR help to make it complete.

The banner specs are: H 27" L 72" and will read,

"The only people who finish the race are those who are given a start.'"

We are looking for someone who can take this phrase and add graphics to make it really stand out. If you are interested, or have a family member who may be willing to design our banner, please forward this information to them.

Please send all entries to Erin Packard at packardkids@hotmail.com
Entries must be received by Thursday, June 2nd.
If your design is chosen, you will receive a free ticket to the San Diego Fair.
***If you are outside the San Diego Area, we will give you something equally awesome.

Birth Mother Group Now Available

Thank you to all of those who came to our Birth Mother Brunch this past Saturday. It was a great day with great food, great stories and great company. For those of you who missed you were just that . . .missed and we hope to see you soon. In fact we have scheduled a Birth Mother's group on May 26th from 6:00PM-8:00 PM at LDS Family Services.
For those of you who don't know, a Birth Mother group is a chance for Birth Moms to get together, share their stories, and discuss things that tend to be specific to that part of the adoption process. The 26th will just be a meet and greet, but in the future we will try to schedule specific topics. Here is the other plus, there will be food!!

We hope to see you there!

LDS Family Services Bldg.
5675 Ruffin Road
Suite 325
San Diego CA. 92123
Meet in the Conference Room
Light snacks provided

Birth Mother's Day Brunch

The Saturday Before Mother's Day is National Birth Mother's Day.
To honor our amazing birth moms, we had an amazing brunch at the home of a sweet adoptive mother, and master chef, Maggie. We had homemade pancakes with homemade syrups, bacon, sausage, eggs, hash browns, fruit, and juice. It was a feast! We ate and talked, and talked, and talked. Next, we had a touching presentation from our new FSA chapter chair, Amanda, during which time she shared THIS article about the making of the song, "From God's Arms, To My Arms, To Yours," by Michael McLean. Each birth mom had the opportunity to introduce herself to the group and share her story. It was a wonderful day and a privilege to be with so many heroic women.

FSA & LDSFS Ladies

Two Cute Birth Moms

BUT...the day would not be complete with out a little swag to take home.

Each Birth Mother received a gift bag filled with goodies. A special thanks to the following donors:
The Body Shop
Deseret Book Store
True Birds
Thank you to all of the Birth Mothers and Adoptive Mother's who made our first Birth Mother's Day brunch a success.
And a VERY special thank you to our FSA secretary, Jenn, for personally making each bag (with matching bookmark to boot) and for collecting and assembling all of the items for the bags.

Faith and Infertility

In the April 2011 Ensign there is an excellent article,
"Faith and Infertility" By Melissa Merrill. It was a pleasant surprise to see that the couples were familiar faces from our national FSA board.

In the same issue of the Ensign, is the following beautiful poem about Adoption.

Just the Same
By Diana Lynn Lacey

Sometimes—
God sends rain
Straight from the sky
To nourish the young flower
and it grows.
Sometimes—
God sends rain from the sky
To the mountaintops,
Then over hills and through valleys
Until it reaches the flower
and it grows, just the same.
Sometimes—
God sends a child
Straight from His realm
Into a mother’s arms
and love grows.
Sometimes—
God sends a child
From heaven to another’s arms,
Then over hills and through valleys
Until he reaches the arms of his mother
and love grows, just the same.

LDS Family Services and Families Supporting Adoption (FSA) invite you to attend a,

Birth Mother Panel

Wednesday, March 9, 2011
7:00p.m.-8:00 p.m.

Escondido South Stake Center
2255 Felicita Rd.
Escondido, CA 92029


We will have the privilage of hearing from a variety of birth mothers in various stages of life, including a birth mother who has recently placed her child for adoption, to a birth mother who has reconnected with her now teenage daugther.


This meeting is for anyone who is interested in adoption, has been, or currently is involved in the adoption process, and all adoption advocates.

***For couples currently in the adoption process, this class can be applied to the required hours of adoption training.

If you have any questions regarding this meeting, please feel free to contact us at sandiegofsa@gmail.com

Reece’s Rainbow

The following blog post link comes from fellow FSA member and adoption advocate, Katrina Morriss. Please take the time to read her heartfelt message and, if able, help these children reach their forever families.

http://makingmanymemories.blogspot.com/2011/01/meet-olga.html

Finding Friday

Loren and Kelly are a loving couple, and the proud parents of their adorable son, Ashton. Loren and Kelly are anxious for the privilege of raising more children and providing a sibling for Ashton. If you are considering adoption, or know of someone who is, you can learn more about this fun family by clicking on THIS link, or viewing their blog at http://www.lorenandkelly.blogspot.com/

Struggling with Infertility

I came across THIS article in Mormon Times yesterday and thought it was well worth sharing.