The Lord's Timing

The phrase, "...in the Lord's timing...," is often spoken in an attempt to comfort couples waiting to adopt. For me, "in the Lord's timing..." just means I am expected to be patient and wait for a really long time for something I want now.
It was not until we adopted our first child, not until over six childless years of marriage, that I understood the Lord's timing. For those six plus years I very impatiently mourned and moaned and pouted about my trials and how I thought things should be different. While my feelings of sadness and longing stemmed from a righteous desire, my reaction to them were rarely faith-filled.

In our seventh year of marriage we adopted our first child and I must tell you, the experience of holding my son for the first time was like a scene from a movie, where several scenes quickly replay before your eyes. I was able to see in that moment that so many of the trials and challenges we had been through were necessary to poke and prod us along a path the led right to that very perfect moment.

Earlier this month, as part of our National Adoption Month celebration, I had the opportunity to attend a special chapel session in the San Diego Temple. The brother conducting the meeting spoke about the significance of the star of Bethlehem, and how, in order for THAT star to appear with such brightness in THAT spot in the sky on THAT night, events had to have taken place in the solar system several years prior.

He concluded that just as the Lord knew what was needed in order for that star to appear at the right time, He also knows what we need and WHEN we need it so that he can bless us as much as possible.

The tricky part, of course, is to let His timing lead us and not let our timing take precedence. For example, even though I had that remarkable experience, sure enough each time our little family hopes to adopt again we have mapped out our "perfect timing" for the blessed event. However, as we see beautiful decorations this holiday season depicting the Star of Bethleham, I hope it will be a reminder to all of us that the Lord's timing will always poke and prod us to where He needs us to be in order to receive the greatest gifts.

NATIONAL ADOPTION MONTH

November is

National Adoption Month.

Here is what our local chapter is doing throughout

November to celebrate the mircale of adoption.

Families Supporting Adoption’s
2nd Annual
National Adoption Month Service Project.

Throughout the entire month of November, Families Supporting Adoption, San Diego Chapter, will be collecting items to donate to Straight From the Heart, Inc., a resource center and resale store in San Marcos, CA, providing help to Foster Children and Foster and Adoptive Parents. We are asking for new or gently used items for children ages newborn to 5 years, such as:
Clothes, shoes, car seats, high chairs, cribs, dressers, twin bedding, crib sheets, diapers, wipes, bottles, educational toys, swings, bouncer chairs, boppy pillows, backpacks, crayons, pencils, burp cloths, bibs, diaper bags, baby carriers, hats, wash cloths, and hooded towels.
(No stuffed animals, please)
You can bring your donated items directly to the store at:
839 W. San Marcos Blvd. San Marcos, CA 92078, Tues 9-2, Wed-Fri 10-3
or contact sandiegofsa@gmail.com
if you would like to arrange for pick-up.

San Diego Temple Trip
Saturday, November 5, 2011

San Diego LDS Temple
7474 Charmant Dr
San Diego, CA 92122

A special Chapel Session with the new
Temple President, and Adoptive Grandfather,
President Finnigan, will
begin at 5:00 p.m.

The Endowment session begins
at 5:30 p.m.

Followed by a trip to
BJ’s Restaurant
8873 Villa La Jolla Dr.La Jolla, CA 92037

This Temple Trip is for any endowed
members of the Church of Jesus Christ
of Latter-day Saints who are interested in adoption, has been, or currently is involved in the adoption process,
and all adoption advocates.

Upcoming Training Meeting

LDS Family Services and Families Supporting Adoption (FSA) invite you to attend an,

Adoption Training Meeting

Wednesday, September 21, 2011
7:00p.m.-8:00 p.m.

Del Mar Stake Center
12701 Torrey Bluff Drive
San Diego, CA 92130

Topic: Keys To A Successful Open Adoption
Presented by Tera Miller

Tera will discuss ways for birthparents and adoptive families to communicate successfully.
Tera is a birthmother, and recently completed her Masters degree in Social Work. She was also a presenter at the FSA National Conference in Layton, Utah this past August.

This meeting is for anyone who is interested in adoption, has been, or currently is involved in the adoption process, and all adoption advocates.

***For couples currently in the adoption process, this class can be applied to the required hours of adoption training.

If you have any questions regarding this meeting, please feel free to contact Amanda Beebe at sandiegofsa@gmail.com, or visit the local FSA Blog at http://sdfsachapter.blogspot.com.

So Long Summer...

San Diego's FSA Chapter invites you to
please join us for an afternoon at Powerhouse Park
1600 Coast Blvd.
Del Mar CA
Saturday, September 10, 2011
3:00 PM - 5:00 PM

We will be meeting at the park with the beach directly below us. Snacks and drinks will be provided. To find out more about the park check out this website:

http://www.sandiegocoastlife.com/attractions/san-diego-coast/parks-powerhouse.html

Please RSVP in the comments section (if you have not done so already via e-vite) so we can make sure we have enough food. Hope to see you there!!!

We are the Champions, My Friend!!!

Remember THIS post about the 2011 San Diego Fair???

Well...WE WON!!!!!!!!!!!!

Last week our chapter received a letter stating,"On behalf of the San Diego County Fair, we would like to congratulate you on a cash award of $100.00 for your organization."

I am so proud of our little chapter-that-could and thankful for everyone who helped make our booth a success. We are grateful for this prize, and hope to use the funds to continue to make a positive impact in the adoption world and in our local community.

Straight From the Heart

During our June Adoption Training Class we had the privilege of hearing a presentation on Special Needs Adoption from guest speaker, Patty Boles.

Patty has been a foster parent to over one hundred children, is an adoptive mother to ten, serves as the president of the North County Foster Parents Association and as executive director of Straight From The Heart, a non-profit resource center and resale store providing support and assistance to foster families. As Part of the Grossmont College Foster and Kinship Care Education Program , Straight From the Heart provides free workshops, classes, and CPR/1st Aid training for foster and adoptive parents.

Most recently, Patty's great advocacy work as been highlighted in THIS North County Times cover story.

To learn more about Patty and Straight from the Heart, feel free to call or visit the resale store located at 839 West San Marcos Boulevard in San Marcos,760-744-224.

You can also support this great organization by donating your gently-used baby and kid's clothing to Straight From the Heart, and encouraging others to do the same.

A Day in the Life- Transracial Adoption

This is a blog post from the personal blog of FSA board member, Erin Packard, as shared during the "Transracial Adoption" class in June.

What Does Your Skin Say?

Today we had some family over to enjoy the pool. The older kids were in the big pool with Auntie Kim, and I was hanging out with Carson in the kiddie pool. There was one other child in the kiddie pool, a little girl, probably two years old. She was with her father. I noticed that he was covered in tattoos. I really did not give him or his tattoos much thought. He seemed to be having a good time with his little girl and that was that. However, at one point he turned around and I saw that one of the tattoos on his back said, "White Pride." Now, any other time in my life I would have just chalked that up to ignorance and gone on my merry way. But this time was different. This time I was in the pool with Carson. This time my heart broke. This time I was filled with questions and anger and fear.
I do not ever recall being a victim of racism. I have, however, been discriminated against. I know what it felt like to be treated differently because I was overweight, and what was even harder to swallow was the way some people treated me when I was thin again. I know what it is like to ask questions to someone and have them respond to my husband because he is clearly the more intelligent species. Yet, I am certain those uncomfortable circumstances pale in comparison to what it must feel like to be treated "less than" solely because of the color of your skin.
During the adoption process, we filled out a form stating which ethnicity we were willing to accept. As much as I ALWAYS wanted a little black boy, this was not a decision we made lightly. Before Carson was ever thought of, we had discussed the ramifications of having a mixed race family. Once we knew that Carson's birth father was black, we continued our discussions more intently. What issues would arise? Would kids treat him differently? What race would he identify with? When issues/discussions of slavery, race, and racism inevitably arise, how will we possibly be able to truly empathize with him? After many nights of pillow talk, prayer, and visits to the Temple, we felt very comfortable with our decision to accept children of other races into our family. And really, the "accepting them" part wasn't the issues, as much as was our need for confirmation that we, as a family, would be able to overcome whatever obstacles we may face as we potentially became a multi-race family.
So along came Carson, our perfect miracle. And as weird as it sounds, sometimes I forget that he is adopted and that he is half black. I just look at him and see my child. But not today. Not in the pool. Not when "White Pride" is staring me in the face. Not when my little tan-man is singing and dancing happily with his little fro bouncing side to side on his huge head. Not when he does not know that the nice man behind him has already categorized him, has judged him, has hated him. No, today I remembered vividly that what Carson's skin says to me is eerily very different from what it says to others. And what that man's skin says to me, in hideous bold lettering, is that we may have some very big hurdles to face down the road.
But for now, I am going to try and take my cues from Carson, who did not seem to notice a thing, and willingly shared his song and dance and sweet smiles with that man, as freely as he did everyone else.